Feeling dizzy………

I just arrived from New York, i’m very tired it’s been a long day! I haven’t yet integrated Artfest  and fully unpacked that i was in a plane again…….which is kind of unsettling. This year maybe because the winter here in Portugal was rude i’m feeling tired as no matter how long i sleep i still wake up feeling dizzy……which is very disturbing for me as i’m used to do a lot of things 

is it the forties? I have this sense that time flies that maybe my creativity is blocked will i evolve will i have new ideas??????? Artfest was overwhelming for me as i was last year but i feel that my brain is out of control that i haven t fully grasp the techniques that i ve learned will i be able to do them again? did i understand correctly?  i’m a slow learner i need time and everything is going so fast but maybe that’s the overall idea now that i try not to control! Let go……accept welcome the unknown……. 
In his class Susan Lenart Kazmer told that we have to be aware of  “pretty things” that’s precisely what we do not want to create, we want people to focus maybe on the message or…..well that was very disturbing for me as know i’m wondering gosh am i creating just… pretty things? which sounded so awful in Susan’s mouth would she look at my stuff and just snorted? grr…….maybe that’s a necessary path to take 3 steps behind to move on? i feel like she’s peering in my studio telling me rubbish no good no good must improve …….see? i really need to sleep maybe tomorrow, my mood will be a sunny one? maybe it’s just this enormous jet lag? I’ve had the confirmation that i will be flying mostly to Asia in june which i must say is unnerving as though i’m excited with all the treasures i will find in old markets in Pekin and Shangai the +8 hours is scaring me a little. Will i be able to sleep? will i ……..stop there is my mental again taking over. Okay i took this photo below in Meat packing district, new york which is one of my favorites spots in big apple plenty of street art around changing every week. go to this place called “pastis” who looks like an old french bistrot very charming with delicious breakfast though for me it was only the sunny side up eggs as i m still on a diet! Good for me is the dukan diet, mostly proteins but very easy to accomodate so far so good lost a few pounds becoming addict to the black earl grey with plenty of milk and sweetener! 
there’s nothing like a good night sleep, my husband being away i let Frimousse (my tiger from Malasia…….) staying with me which seemed a good idea except at 3am when he starts miaw miaw grrr……plenty of work to do as next week end is “craft and design” so cross my fingers that my creativity will flow…. i’m excited with the resin and the encaustic wax let’s see what comes up. i’ve been reading “a thousand white women” by Jim Fergus which i higly recommend if you fancy stories about americans natives. so i would love to make a resin album about the cheyennes, love their world and their concept of life. 
HAVE A GOOD WEEK……oh happy easter almost skip it!!!! no eggs chocolate for me this year…

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  1. I don't think your work is just "pretty". It seems very honest to who you are. I tend to really respond to true artists who know who they are and put themselves into their work. I am not a big fan of cutesy work, or pretty for the sake of pretty with no depth or character of the artist. But I don't see you as that person. You and your work have so much heart and soul, don't doubt it for a moment!

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